Tuesday, November 20, 2007
你不配

我不配
作词：方文山　作曲：周杰伦

这街上太拥挤　太多人有秘密　玻璃上有雾气在被隐藏起过去
你脸上的情绪　在还原那场雨　这巷弄太过弯曲走不回故事里

这日子不再绿　又斑驳了几句　剩下搬空回忆的我在大房子里
电影院的座椅　隔遥远的距离　感情没有对手戏你跟自己下棋

还来不及仔仔细细写下你的关于
描述我如何爱你　你却微笑的离我而去

这感觉　已经不对　我努力在挽回 　
一些些　应该体贴的感觉　我没给 　
你嘟嘴　许的愿望很卑微　在妥协 　
是我忽略　你不过要人陪

这感觉　已经不对　我最后才了解 　
一页页　不忍翻阅的情节　你好累 　
你默背　为我掉过几次泪　多憔悴 　
而我心碎你受罪　你的美　我不配


p/s:
你真的不配

Monday, November 19, 2007
Daddy God's love for you NEVER changes. (:

even when the tough gets going;
even in times when you feel like you're all alone fighting the battle;
even when you feel like you're only 1% away from being crushed;
even when you see that everything is going against you;
even when all you hear is bad news;
even when your future seems bleak;
even when evil seems to be truimphing;
even when you dont know if you'll survive today;

even when you DONT feel Daddy God's love;

Daddy God is still loving you all the same!
if not, maybe just that bit more.
coz Daddy knows what you are going through. (:
He does. (:

knowing that Daddy God truly understands what you are going through,
that's priceless.
my Saviour knows my dirty little secrets of misery, pain, afflication, hardship!
things which i dont feel like sharing with people,
he understands. (:
wholeheartedly.
openheartedly.

Daddy God, Rome is not built in a day.
i know You are moulding me for the better through all these trials and tribulations ive been facing. (:

Sunday, November 18, 2007
alias for a day

Wednesday, November 14, 2007
i heart my daddy loo.

it breaks my heart seeing my daddy lying on the hospital bed.
with tubes and needles injected in his body.
staying alone in his ward.
4 plain white walls.
no telly.
no, not even a jug of water on the table.

to me, that's the most cold inhuman room ive been in.
but yet, in there, lies my most beloved daddy.

it breaks my heart seeing my mummy in heartache too.
my mummy's daddy past away a few years ago in the wee hours of the night due to heart attack as well.
i believe it's a much tougher patch for her.

when i saw my daddy last night, with tears streaming down his face, at that moment i was really afraid that i could have lost my daddy forever and never see him away.
my daddy who is forever humorous and plain silly.
my daddy who is concerned about why i am single.
my daddy who always asked me for a hug since young till i was in my teens.
my daddy who is my "chauffeur" whenever he is available.
my daddy who has been my daddy for 23 years.
it's the first time i see my daddy's health in such a bad state.

last night when i was lying in bed, i couldn't bear the thought of my daddy falling asleep in such a cold cold room. i know i would be so terrified.
but i know daddy god is there with him, protecting my earthly daddy.
daddy god has assigned an army of angels to keep my daddy comforted and safe.
my daddy is in my daddy god's good hands. i know. (:

Sunday, November 11, 2007
im not perfect.

i am not perfect. (:
hence i need Daddy God. (:

ive been waking up each morning, once eyes wide open, im bombarded with dark thoughts.
can i just say that it's so scary?
it been weeks and im trusting Daddy God. (:

it's been such a tough period.
a season of short showers of rain.
Life is hollow when im not seeing Daddy God bigger than anything else.

i know Daddy God is so awesome. (:
i know Daddy God loves me unconditionally. (:
i thank Daddy God for putting the sweet people in my life. (:

dolly, thanks for being such a sweetheart.
hearing me complain about this and that.
calling me at the right time when i happen to be crying. haa.
spending time and keeping me company.
being real with me.
making me laugh just by your "weird" laughter. hee.
you're a blessing in my life.
you have been. for a decade and counting. hee.

Saturday, November 03, 2007
photo-taking day!

Thursday, November 01, 2007
the life of being jesus-loved. (:

I told Daddy God recently, "Daddy, it doesn't matter if no one else loves or cares about me. as long as i know you love me, that's all i need. (:"

Truly thank daddy god for loving me UNCONDITIONALLY. (:

Daddy God is so awesome. He knew that i was feeling unloved and unappreciated. It's true that Daddy God supersede all your expectations and surprise you with the WOWs in life! (:

i handed my almost-Santa-sized daddy (okok, my daddy isn't that obese. hee. but he's very fair, like Santa clause. just missing the white beard and a full head of white hair. hee.) the monthly allowance once i gotten my salary. my daddy not only asked me to take back half of the amount and told me that should i need extra cash, i can approach him for help. i was SHOCKED! it's the first time my daddy ever said this to me! that's not all.

my daddy then asked if i was doing ok and i nodded. he continued to press on by asking a few more times, and i replied him assuring him that i was doing fine. all these while, I didn't dare to look him in the eye because my tears were on the verge of falling. I didn't want my daddy to see me cry. i didn't want him to see her little girl's tears. I feel so loved by my daddy. It's the first time that I'm feeling this way and I'm sure it wouldn't be the last too.

these days my mummy has been calling me on my mobile more frequently, checking if I'll be coming back for dinner. preparing my favourite dishes. speaking to me in a more concerned manner rather than her usual naggy and impatient tone. it's so sweet that my mummy tells me that she loves me in her small little ways.

i didn't expect my parents to be able to sense that their little girl has been in low spirits lately. honestly. whenever I'm home, my behaviour has always been solemn and you hardly find me speak to anyone. hence it's strange that they could see that something is bothering me because I'm behaving as per normal.

my parents' small little ways of saying I LOVE YOU to their little girl means the whole world to me. it's so Jesus-loved. I know it's Daddy God showing me how much my parents care and heart me. it's so sweet. (:

melly nail skins!

traces of sunshine. (: